Danielle Lineker: My New Stepfamily, Tuesday 9pm, BBC Three

Posted by Stewart Turner

Danielle Lineker


My New TV Career would perhaps have been a more appropriate title for lingerie model Danielle Lineker’s look at the heartbreaking world of family break-ups. Certainly there was little in the way of insight in this hour long piece of fluff. Instead the whole thing played like a moving Hello! magazine centrespread – all long, lingering shots over wedding photos on the mantelpiece and clips of the Linekers putting out mince pies for Santa at Christmas.

So what did we learn? Well, the Match of the Day man’s not too clever with a barbecue for one, and I doubt whether his undercooked chicken breasts and sorry-looking sausages did much to foster family harmony in the newly-extended Lineker household. Oh, and we also learned that the hassles of press attention mean Danielle, Gary and the kids have it even trickier than most new families. “Nothing’s ever that private,” Danielle explained to the TV documentary maker mournfully.

The film mainly centred around Danielle’s attempts to ingratiate herself with George, the eldest Lineker lad, who celebrity-watchers would’ve recognised from his brief fling with Big Brother's Sophie Reade a month or two back. We were told George is “a man of few words”, but one has to wonder whether sticking a TV crew in front of him and asking him personal questions was the best way to get him chatting. Or the best way to foster a healthy relationship with your new stepson, for that matter.

Still, George did concede that his new stepmum organised a brilliant 18th birthday bash for him at Mahiki, which must come as a great comfort to any of us plebs struggling to nurture a relationship with a newly-acquired stepson. £50,000 behind the bar and a few Hollyoaks actors and you’ll be sorted - that and a handful of backstage tickets to watch The X Factor being recorded.

The film was on far firmer ground when it burst from its celebrity bubble to interview Real People like Lauren, who was seven when her parents split up, or 19-year-old Leah, whose family break-up forced her to abandon her education in order to find somewhere to live. Still, at least they both have one consolation: their stepmums never forced them to meet Simon Cowell.


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